“It takes the extraordinary to make the ordinary.”
This morning, I woke up to the above quote. I put quotes around it because I’m convinced that someone said it, at least they said it to me, as i was waking up. Surely it didn’t come from my own psyche. And, if it did, I have no idea what it means.
So, since I’m the person who has to know and understand as much as possible in this life, I went on a hunting expedition. I looked it up on Google. I wanted to see who said it? Needless to say, I didn’t find anything with those exact words. Nobody ever said, “It takes the extraordinary to make the ordinary.” Therefore, I had no idea why I heard those words upon my morning awakening.
The fact that it caught my attention, and I remembered it, is saying something too. I normally don’t pay too much attention to my first thoughts in the morning. Today, I did. I felt the touch of the Master’s hand on my forehead (rhetorically speaking, of course). I did not feel any touch today. I didn’t feel a presence of God. It was merely a feeling, or rather, a hunch that maybe God was trying to tell me something. Of what — I do not know.
Maybe God is speaking to me, now, in parables? I about go crazy with research when I want to find out something. At. least that’s how it was in the past. In these days, I show an interest, and do a little research. And, if I do not find anything, well then, onward I go.
Help me, Lord, to discern right thinking and right thought…
I remember the first time I felt the Holy Spirit in my heart during Thanksgiving dinner. It was in 2018, a mere 7 months after my second conversion, which occurred on Divine Mercy Sunday. It wasn’t like any ordinary Thanksgiving.
I’ll call this eggs benedictine, which I had this afternoon for brunch. It is asparagus, bread stuffing, two poached eggs and white sauce. Thank you, Father for this beautiful day, these gifts that only you offer to us through the earth and all its goodness. Through Christ, our Lord. Amen.
Amazingly, even after 7 months, I was still full of the Holy Spirit in thought, word, deed and emotion. And, the feelings of fervor were strong within me.
I wrote about all those experiences (on and earlier blog: smarieack@livejournal.com) but those blog entries were sort-of-like newsworthy accounts of what happened to me. I may have touched on feelings and emotions at the time, but it was merely coincidental.
Here I wish to communicate the actual feelings, if I may, and show how these teachings of the Holy Spirit accompany them.
It was early in my second conversion, maybe a month or two later, when I first realized that the Holy Spirit was *visiting me* and would be my personal guide and teacher. I was struggling with some strong negative nameless issues and wondering how I would ever overcome them. Little did I realize God was listening to me and hearing my undirected prayer. He answered me. It wasn’t an answer in words; it was more like a prompting, or a vision. I performed an action and immediately, I saw a blue laser light in my mind’s eye. In case you’re just joining me, I’ve written about the lights in separate blog entry here: https://smarieack.livejournal.com/7133.html .
During this particular visit, I understood that the Holy Spirit was speaking to me in a wordless message, a message that I understood as “Everything is ok. Everything is good. You are my student and I will show you the way.”
And, he did. From that point on, whenever there was some specific learning experience in a book I was reading, or in an action I was performing, I seemed to receive a message (or a prompting) that it was right, just and good. I remember feeling in awe — always in awe — of the revelation. It was always a surprise to me, and I always thanked him without measure.
On Thanksgiving day, in 2018, I happened to be having dinner alone at a nearby Cracker Barrel. The place was packed. The wait was way over an hour, but I had nothing else planned and no where to be. I sat in one of the rockers outside, waiting for my turn. As faith would have it, I was calm, content and mildly curious about what was going on around me. There were families, lots of families, and friends and relatives standing around, waiting for their turns. I remember wondering about them, and watching mildly as they each, in turn, left my line of sight.
Then, my name was called and I too entered the doors into yet another little world. The waitress brought me to my seat, where I was surrounded by more families. I was very happy that day to just be alone with God. When my biscuits arrived, I said my grace and tasted the first bite. The taste in my mouth was upwards of heavenly. It was truly not a taste of worldly pleasure. It was otherworldly, almost extraterrestrial. I remember looking up, and saying, “Thank you, Father, for this gift.” It was unlike me.
I was over-the-top thankful, and extremely happy to be exactly where I was in that moment.
Today, it’s a rare thing for me to not say grace. I do it almost always. I may not have that celestial feeling like I did on Thanksgiving Day, 2018, but I thank Him every day. I give Him praise. Sometimes, I even hold my plate up in the air, like a priest does at the Eucharist. God is always with us. He should be thanked. He gave us everything. We are His servants and He will never leave us.
